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went to hope with matt and t-flow.

his mom sure likes me! i think that's pretty cool.

our turkey day was fucking sweet..

spent the day yesterday walking through old railway tunnels, smoking up near gorgeous fucking rivers, and watching salmon swim upstream.


it was fucking beautiful.

my head is killing meeeeeeeeeee.

ffffuck i want someone to shoot me right NOW!

i gotta pee.
so uhm..


leper at the cobalt!


fear of tomorrow!

annnnd sunday we leave for Hope!

on Monday we eat a fuck load

then come home.


for colonization day!

friends much?

fri. went to the bar. got drunk. left to buy drugs... ate drugs... was lost... had a guy kiss me and wouldn't stop. tyler couldn't wait anymore so he took off with drunk matt and kelsey. they found me at organics fucked up. they ate their drugs. we left to catch the bus. tyler and i saw matt and kelsey making out and touching. tyler ran to them and yelled that we had to go but they kept making out so he said fuck you i'm taking sab and we're gone. we got home and talked. matt and kelsey came in... matt was coming upstairs i stopped him and said we were done.

matt and i are finished. 6 years gone.

i talked to kelsey about all my problems that involved matt...

she hasn't even said sorry to me.

i don't want to be here anymore


Yeah, I'm coming home!


Well, I am leaving on November 1st or 2nd. Not quite sure. BUT I DO KNOW THIS! I AM GOING TO BE AT HOME FOR THE FUCKIN AGENT ORANGE SHOW ON NOV. 5TH!

Antone, if you read this..





T-Flow n ME!


i changed my furrr :|
Everyone is sick with the flu. It all started out with me. But where did I get it? I got sick instantly after the dayglo show on the 13th. Weird. Anyway, on the 19th Matt, Kelso and I went to see Dayglo again but this time with mother fuckin DOA! I have never seen em and I'm sooo fucking I'm happy I did.

I fell on my head a bunch of times in the pit and perhaps got concussed. Definitely got covered in massive bruises. Bigger and longer lasting that's for sure. There was a fuck load of drama going on but I don't wanna type all that bull shit down.

Let's just say I ended up leaving the show early because the two I was with were saying mean things and I wanted to get the fuck out. I'm sure there were reasons for all that was said.

I ended up outside the Commodore and looking for T-Flow cause he said he was gonna be there. So I couldn't find him and just sat and waited for Matt and Kelso. I stood up and as soon as I did Tyler pounced on me. I was lucky.

So, I said, let's get the fuck out of here and proceeded to tell him all the juicy gossip.

He was kind of pissed and kind of annoyed at everything but he's over it now.

If it weren't for him I would have never made it home. I was drunk and being on the sky train can get confusing sometime.

The day after the show T-Flow and I hitched to his mama's. His mama lives in Hope.

We didn't get out of Vancity till like fuckin 6 pm. It was getting dark and raining by the time we hit the highway. This guy picked us up after waiting for an hour and a half. He had this boat and I kept asking about it. He didn't really talk all that much. He dropped us off in Chilliwack and we waited there for like 20 minutes probably. It was really dark and we had just passed the NO HITCH HIKING PICK UP IS ILLEGAL sign and then it really started to rain. This nice old man picked us up and he had good conversations with us every now and then.

We finally made it to Hope and Tyler had forgotten his mama's phone number at home so we decided to just walk to her house but he didn't quite know where it was so we walked in the direction he sort of knew anyway. She ended up driving into town trying to find us and luckily found us.

As soon as we got in we ate food and drank hot tea. I got to play with the kitty that lives there and she was such a cute fucking cat. Holy shit. The most adorable kitty evar!

Tyler stole apples for his mom then we went to bed.

Woke up at 12 the next day, ate a yummy breakfast and packed all of Tyler's stuff then took off back to PoCo around 4. We waited for a good hour and a half for our ride out of Hope. It was also raining the day we left for home. It sucked but it could have been worse.

These two nice people picked us up and the driver- name was Peter- made good conversation.

He even dropped us off at Braid station which is only 30-45 minutes away from home.

It was sweeeeet!

We got home and Kelso had made a bad ass Sunday dinner and we ate like dogs!

We were cold and tired when we got home, but we were home.

I'm covered in dots n spots

Elaine, Tyler, Matt, Dirk and I went to see Dayglo Abortions and SNFU last Saturday night. It was fucking aweeeeeeeeesome. FUCKING AWESOME.

The Cobalt was fucking packed and we luckily got in as soon as they started the count for the cut off. Fuckin A right? Yeah. I spent most of my night in the pit after slamming three beers down. After the first three I was a bit tipsy and then I knew it was time for me to kick ass in the roaring pit full of big scary boys. I got my lip busted, a fat cheek almost a black eye.

There was also drama going on but I don't wanna get into that. It's bull shit anyway. I don't deal with that kind of stuff all that well, so I'm going to stay out of this one as best as I can.

I need to cover my ass too and I DON'T want anyone fucking hating me because I "take sides".

I don't take sides. I'm a neutral cell.

It was a good night though. But, I lost one of my fucking juggling balls. :(


I saw Against Me! For the first time everrrrrrrrrr.

Kelso came back into town and I met up with her at the skytrain station then we ate two fat ass burgers then took off to find a pub.

Found one and the first few drinks were 4 shots of rum and two cider things. We had two more shots downed our peach growers and left for the show.

We get to the place and we're already fucked up but we bought more beers anyway. Then after downing our last bits of booze Against Me! came on and we ran in to make our way to the front. No dice on that one though. The place was fucking packed full of 15 year old twats.

It was a good show though. Even though they played their newer shit they also played quite a few of their old stuff. I was fucking drunk and having a fucking fun time. I was excited to see AM before they really sucked ass.

Well, other than that...

Everything is going pretty good lately.

And SMELSO is back!

9-11 was an inside job.

As we all know that 9-11 was an orchestrated event that was put on by our vile government and rich ‘superiors’- We cannot and must not ever forget those who have lost their lives for this group of swine. Mothers, fathers, brothers, sisters, and friends- Can’t you see? We are all in the midst of something atrocious brewing up. We need to stand with each other and not against each other to seek the truth and take back our true rights as Americans, as people.

Let us stop the fuckers who are using 9-11 as a way to gain the attention from the brainwashed society. Let’s stop this from ever happening again. Let’s stop our over bearing government from trying to control every thing we do. This was all apart of their plan. To get us scared. To get us wanting to feel like we need protection from evil countries, people, and religions. If you ask me, I will tell you flat out that as of right now, there is nothing in this world that will ever change my mind. America is going down and if we don’t try to put this to a stop and if no one ever opens their eyes and gets informed we are all going to be tracked (rfid tags) like a herd of animals and possibly killed for our beliefs, our ‘freedom of speech’, or just refusing to stand up to a flag you truly don’t believe in.

I know I will NOT become apart of the herd. I know that I WILL NOT be tagged like a fucking animal. I know that I WILL NOT bow down to any person or thing who is trying to get me to “obey the rules” because it is “un-American” and I will be considered a terrorist. If I am, so be it.

This day should not be the only day that we all get together for a full minute and mourn over the losses, but it should be the starting of our new lives and wanting to take what’s ours back. I’m already trying.
Are you?

Your comrade,


So I guess

It would be nice if I could touch yer body.


I'm f'n hungry. I made Matt and Dirk pancakes this morning and a huge one the size of our largest plate for Tyler. hahahah

I don't really like eating pancakes all that much. They're okay, but I'd rather have something more delicious. Like, a 100 apples.

I fucking love apples.

So, I took a shower, and now I'm just waiting for T-Flow to get his ass up so we can go to the park already!

Sep. 3rd, 2008

Tyler bo byler lives with us now. Dirk goes to college. Matt's getting a raise- up to 15 dollahs an hour. Ballah! Kelso is leaving to the Sewer this Slursday.

Everyone is up to a buncha stuff except for me. Well, I'm going to start making patches out the ying yang, and fix my pants.

It might not be the best for everyone else, but making shit is therapeutic for me.

Cut my finger while shaving my legs today.

Finger hurts, but I'm purrdy smooth. ha!

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